A pinch happiness with two pinch pain

What is true and what not is something I am not aware of. The past was showing me all the colours of life which never existed. And here I am, again, to feel the grey shades of life at their best. Did the colours fly away or did I go blind? Was it something that i had done? I started believing in myself. I started believing that it can't be right, I cannot be right! I felt as if my hands had knives on them to stab, my eyes had fire in them to burn and my words had thorns in them to make that someone bleed. I started believing it was always something that was never mine. It was something I never deserved. With people telling me I was wrong but was that someone wrong? Was the words spoken by that someone false, I didn't think so! So here I am to feel the dark sides take over and teach me to go more deeper and sink into the black sea like a black rock!

Flying high....

I was ignorant to the strength in me, 
while my past was making me agree,

Though so rough, All so tough,

It was all a blur with an extra fur.

At a point where all was gloomy,

And my heart was extremely achy,

I decided to leave that way,

Which made my soul to obey.

And the days started to fly,
Showing me all the colors at a high.
With my heart and soul together,
Putting to my hat the happiness feather.

I was always a happy spirit,
With shades of me being all fearless.
I had left the gloomy me,
Far behind where my sorrows had to plea.

I aspire to fly,
Making my dreams, my wings,
To take me high...!!

Tired....

Being pointed at and blamed for the things she did not do was making her question her existence. What she was suffering from was a mystery to all. She wanted to tell it to everyone, she did, but nobody believed. The one person she was hoping who could come back to her saying he understand was standing in the same crowd who blamed her the most. He was the one who was shouting out her faults. The one person who should have shielded her from all others was making her seem like a criminal. She was deteriorating from inside and was soon to be hollow. But neither did he realize it nor did he care. She kept on telling him to just say a few words that could sooth her and would make her just like he wants but he refrained. He complained that it was too much for him. She couldn't take the blame anymore, blame that uprooted her relationship from its existence. The mere thought of him saying those horrifying words made her whole life crumble down like a piece of paper. But he said it. He uttered those scary words and made the last tear from her body to just go away. She never did anything but all she got was that she was the mess of someone's life. And the time came when she lost everything she had and was left to sulk in the darkness again!

A Hearty Promise...

You will be in my heart,

Cuz you have made me your part...

For u, I promise,

I will never make you whine,

Just tell me one time,

You will be mine, till the last mile!

For u, I promise,

I will never make you lose,

Just say you will choose,

To be with me till our last blues!

Finding Myself...

Silent for too long was her way of looking at life. It just took a second for her life to crumble down. The distance made a awful sound with the words of pain flowing through her ears. And just like that her life was broken not knowing was it her or his feelings of that day. She was walking into a dark lane of loneliness with her blinded sight. She plead for an answer, answers that would make her believe in present. She was soaking wet by her own tears. Being drenched in them completely she could see herself naked from all the lies and hatred. She felt a acute ray of pain stabbing her through the chest and penetrated her deep into the memory lane. With no one on the side she was let to sink in more. All she needed was someone to tell her that she was the one. But that someone had a different world that was not permitting. Refraining from the reality was not the way. She was just waiting for some words with espousal.