The breathing out of a soul......

She was quiet, she was silent. She was waiting for the last stang. She was not knowing where to stop and how to stop. She wanted her heart to know that it's over or it should be over. She kept on telling herself to go on until the last ounce of her weak and fragile heart would break. It broke, it scattered and it shelled out a thousands of small pieces which she did not know she was breaking. She, again like ever, tried to put it back. She tried to see the broken pieces again even though she knew she was not going to get them. But the pieces were, being the most cruel, kept falling apart. They called to her, just to remind her of the misery and pain that they brought to her. Her soul was trying to get up from her own body leaving it dry and strewing it till the last bit. Was she going to start a new or was going to end herself, not to be alive.....ever again.....

Winged...

She was flowing with the water and flying with the wind. She was taking it all in. Life keeping her hollow after all the pouring in uncertainties. The ups and downs were so deep that she was not able to understand how much to rise and how much to fall. Was letting go an option or holding it in one? The questions left unanswered makes her inhibitions more stronger. Does her needs and wishes mean anything to him? Does she not being there would change him? Life was showing her a strange way out of this. Her absence would do wonders was the one. Her non existence would make him change. But what is the use of doing all this when she would not be around to see him change, grow and emerge a new. What would all this pain mean if she has to leave without even knowing the outcome? Does her absence really mean this much.......??

Delirious....

Flown with the wind were her strengths and metier. With the soaked voice, she was calling out to someone who was not able to hear it. She had a frame, a picture perfect which depicted the real lady in her. She was a clad in the thought of making it come true. Her thoughts, so strong and bold fencing in the mammoth of emotions inside. She was refraining from the changes in her. She wanted to remind herself of what she was....the way she was. She was struggling with her own self to make her believe she was the same. The palate of her life was once filled with the colors of life, freedom, happiness and thrill. Did she spill the palate all over or was it her determinations that led her to ruin them. What was so enormously wrong that she didn't even care about herself and get bumped against the biggest hurdle....superficial self. What use to be was not just a passing memory. The colors seem to react harshly to the exposure. The only solidest striker was the one at the back.....The Black!!!

The glimpse of the hollow me...

Though so small, he stood in the corner of her heart and poked her hard with his conduct. The unexplainable behavior made her think the ill. Was she bad....was she selfish...was she unreasonable...?? Whenever she was pushing a huge gulp of positivity down her mind her heart pushed it back. All the hopes and faiths came crying out loud to her with their disheartened persona. She was sinking into a whole other world of darkness where even the light was turning black. Where all other world was waking up she was slumping into the sea of blackness. Her whole world was turning black and white. The palate of colors of her life was falling from God's hands and were spilling her life all over....never to be filled again. Fault.....was it her's or was it of someone else? If her's, she would have faced the sharp cuts on her existence boldly but if not then......? Love makes you forget yourself, it sure does and it did for her too. She completely forgot the most powerful word 'me'. But does she forgetting herself helped in making him realize? Does he know that dissolving a vast part of 'ME' to craft a new 'US' was not a easy chore. Still she did it with pride and simplicity nothing to expect in return. But something still came in return....something that was unhoped-for, something unknown, something unusual.....something uncalled-for.....

Friendly touch.....strangely felt!!

With a soft voice, softer look and a softest touch he touched my hand. I was standing there with the broken pieces of my heart. But he was smiling, a smile that went from his to mine. He was looking right into my eye and was telling me to pick up my pieces and put them back together. I was trying striving hard to not let the pieces win over my protest. And the ultimate moment of win neared and got high up in the trance of the dapple. The stranger's look went deeper into my eyes and gave me the most amazing strength of standing up, up against my fears. He took my hand made me keep it on my heart and look into the sky...up high. I stared and stared but my sight was left dry and thirsty. With a wave of disappointment and anguish i looked back at the stranger...but he was gone. He was no where around to make me see again. I waited for him to come back.....come back and never leave again. But all i could recollect in my empty mind was his soft voice, softer look and the softest touch.........
Where he must have flown away...i thought to myself. Was he a illusion? Was he magic or just a fantasy? The doors in my mind were shutting down and i was running out of answers.....answers to all my questions. Who was he who showed me the best trick of my life if he was an illusion, the best prank of my life if he was magic and the best dream of my life if he was a fantasy....My ears kept searching for his voice, my eyes for his look and my hand for his touch...!

Gloomy tear rolling on a wounded heart......

With all the hopes and aspirations, beliefs and faiths i kept looking at him. All the world around me made me just stare him in the eye and ask one simple question. The question didn't get answered. I kept on asking but it just never got answered. I never expected anyone to be so ruthless, so inconsiderate and so unthoughtful yet saying those three magical words ' I Love You'. All i wanted was a good night sleep with nothing to worry about in the morning. All i wanted was a heart that could read mine. The lips that would speak my heart. But then there i saw a huge black light coming my way with a sword of wretched laughs which turned my hopes into despairs, my beliefs into shattered dreams and my love into a sore heart. The gloominess was conquering my heart. I so wanted to stay up. I so wanted to have a morning that would welcome me with its arms open. I so wanted to have dreams of my fulfilled life.....I so wanted my dream to have him in it.....!!