Gloomy tear rolling on a wounded heart......

With all the hopes and aspirations, beliefs and faiths i kept looking at him. All the world around me made me just stare him in the eye and ask one simple question. The question didn't get answered. I kept on asking but it just never got answered. I never expected anyone to be so ruthless, so inconsiderate and so unthoughtful yet saying those three magical words ' I Love You'. All i wanted was a good night sleep with nothing to worry about in the morning. All i wanted was a heart that could read mine. The lips that would speak my heart. But then there i saw a huge black light coming my way with a sword of wretched laughs which turned my hopes into despairs, my beliefs into shattered dreams and my love into a sore heart. The gloominess was conquering my heart. I so wanted to stay up. I so wanted to have a morning that would welcome me with its arms open. I so wanted to have dreams of my fulfilled life.....I so wanted my dream to have him in it.....!!

Time...The Twisting Traitor....

He was holding himself up with hope....hoping for that time to come back....time that had flown past him, laughing at him, showing all sorts of dreams, so unattainable. He was unable to gather the intensity, the strength to shout back and tell it, that soon he will be back....back for the best. He wanted time to know that even if it had shown him the worst, with forte he held, he will be riposting. How unfair it could turn, how unjust it could do which turned the crown of the creed to the slave of the self sort. When he needed the most he had none. Why did that significant creator made him choose the unwanted. Or was he the chosen unwanted? What questions and what answers...whom to ask and who to answer was all in the mind....mind of the significant creator.

Zestfully happy...

With good times just round the corner i need to get close to what i was pushing away since long. The terms of endearment getting on and to the core of my heart. Never thought this would make me feel so high. Up in the sky. I don't want to let it go. I won't let it go. I was getting all worked up to fight the worst. Yet my life got me all worked up to face the best. When i fought with god, i said why are you making me struggle so hard when i feel i deserve better...he replied in simple words saying "I know". I thought even he doesn't want to grant me happiness but then there he was standing on the turn showering me with my prayers and showing me the path ahead. Little i knew was coming on my way. This day solely was not expected. One day was devoted to all my wishes to come true. That was the time when i just looked into my heart and said a silent 'Thank You' to someone who made me feel so good...so warm. Was i bad that when things were not right i just couldn't take and wanted to end it all. When i was running low it wasn't my heart that did it but it was my mind. There was a line that was dividing me into two, i was on the edge where i had to fall on either side. Fortunately or not it either side turned out to be right for me....as i had the same person catching me on both.

Returning footsteps.....

I kept looking at your footsteps going away from me. This time not to return so early. I looked at them with all hope...that at least they would turn to me and tell me that you will be back. I saw you leaving. I saw your back going far away....yet it was telling me something. Telling me things that we never spoke to each other. It told me to hold onto this, till you return. I agreed. By all odds.
I somewhere knew that you telling me this was as hard on you as on me. I knew even if you are telling me to be strong you were breaking inside....just like me. I knew if you could, you would pull me into your arms, though i rebelled, and hold me tight and whisper "I LOVE YOU".

Embarking on.....

With all the negativism aside going on the positivist prospect. With all the fire in my heart i swung myself into the air.....so high....like fly....yet so wry....But with full hope...m going high.